I have not written here since leaving my former church and helping to start the current church I attend. First let me say there are very good things in each of these churches and wonderful people in each. But hindsight is a bitter sweet gift is it not? Looking back I now see all the deception and lies that brought us to where we are. I know that God can and does take our wrong choices and turns them into something good. I know that even though we have been led down a wrong path that God will use that path to teach us something while moving us back to the path we should be on. I have watched from day 1 a group of people being swept up by this great emotionalism that has become a way of "doing" church. I watch week after week as the co-pastor of MHF tries to whip up some emotion for the people to ride and if she can't get them on her emotional wagon then the church service is declared a "bad" one. Sunday after Sunday the people leave with nothing more than emotions to get them thru the week. There is no spiritual food only fluff. Emotions flare week after week because that is all that we have. I grew up in churches like these and I promised myself I would not go back to one but I find myself leading one. I can no longer lead these people in the direction they choose to follow. I can no longer lead myself I have found. I long each week for a service with substance but it never happens. I'm at a crossroads here and I have no idea what to do. I can't go back to where I came from...I would never ask those people to extend any welcome to me regardless of how deceived I and others were in leaving there. I cannot stay where I am unless something drastically changes. So for now I will listen and hope and pray that it's not too late to hear God calling and maybe this time I will get it right.
sherri
